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My ire for those who search high and low for exact replicas of the homeland food products is irrationally great. Particularly when they are from the same place as me, and insist time after time after time that they must have: graham crackers! regular cheerios! or whatever! This time of year everyone is a-twitter with cranberry sauce and sweet potatoes, and come camping season, surely will come the s’mores request.

Wherefore I provide to you the following, the Chile s’mores hack.

You will need:

1 bar Karina milk chocolate, bought in the gringo foods section in Santa Isabel, Lider and other supermarkets, not with the rest of the chocolate, I don’t know why. Buy Hershey’s if you must, but the Hershey’s we get is formulated to withstand the heat of Brazil, where it is made, and it tastes even more like wax than usual.

1 bag marshmallows. I have never noticed a difference in marshmallow taste from one brand to the next. There, I have said it, I am not a marshmallow expert. Please unfollow if necessary.

1 packet “Vino” crackers. They are not graham crackers. They do not taste the same. But they are the right shape, and they are crunchy, and unless you want to import them yourself or make crackers, half of which will end up on the ground, because yo, s’mores break easily, just use the vino crackers. You can also use galletas Maria, which are a closer taste match but a) round b) harder to find and c) often have grasa bovina in them. I’ll stick to the mashed up cowsey and horsey bones in my marshmallows, that’s enough for me, thank you.

Here is what your assembled snackarrific “ingredient” pile will look like at 10:30 PM when you get home from the supermarket, and whereupon you realize you have no idea what language your brain functions in anymore, when you mishear “at 10 PM, the supermarket stops selling bebidas alcohólicas” as something about meatballs (albóndigas). This was through headphones, hearing’s not that bad yet, thank goodness.

Chile s'mores hack

From there you know what to do. Toast, smoosh, eat.

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Also, if you notice vastly different lighting conditions, you are very observant. I have officially spoiled all my meals of the day and had a s’more for second breakfast. No regrets. Also, finally a food that doesn’t look jaundiced against my “screw my security deposit-colored” walls.