And contrary to the popularly-held misconception, a Spaniard would not say Thaturday’th Theven Tnarky Thnapth. That’s Elmer Fudd. Spaniards only -th the c and zs in speech. Which you can put in your pocket and take out for trivia night, though be careful, people may start to call you (yourname)-oogle. I’m just thaying.
So here are seven snaps from the previous week which I think pretty well typify some repeated traveler and expat observations about Chile.
1. The dogs sleep anywhere they feel like it. Also, they are picky eaters and prefer kibble and meat to all forms of carbohydrates. This one has his face in a pile of french fries, and isn’t budging. And yes, he was alive.
2. Just because you call it pizza does not make it pizza. These guys set up here there and everywhere, set up a gas-powered oven of dubious cleanliness and slap down some flattened rolls with a piece or two of sweaty cheese atop. I know we’re beating the whole pizza-in-Santiago thing a bit to death, but this truly is an abomination before Italy. Darn cheap though, and will suffice in a pinch. Olives optional.
3. Things may look the same in Santiago as at home, but when you get a little closer, you’ll discover tiny little differences that will make you scratch your head. Also, the native speaker’s intuition will never die. I haven’t been in a KFC in the United States in at least ten years, but I can nearly guarantee that there is nothing on the menu called “rods.”
4. There is no end to the abuse of dictionaries and machine translation vis-a-vis confused misuse of words. This one is understandable, at least. And I should say, it wasn’t translated by the actual postal service here, rather likely a hilltop vendor of postcards and such atop Cerro San Cristobal. No relation to the guy who will pose your kid atop a stuffed zebra and snap a photo, for a price. Why a zebra? Why, indeed.
5. Inconsiderate motorists are the norm, not the exception. This construction truck has decided to straddle the bike lane during prime travel hours for your pedalling pleasure. Thanks, construction truck! I always look for a reason to swerve out into traffic.
6. The restroom can be elusive at times, but if you can hold it, it will come.
7. Even when someone explains to you what is going on and why someone is dressed like a combination of a rat and the center-left presidential candidate/former president (Frei), and even if you speak Spanish, it still doesn’t make a whit of sense. But you should always ask anyway, and if you’re really curious, look up his channel on Youtube (I’m not that curious, I suppose).
Brought to you by nosiness, my personal endless store of snark, random silly, and of course, the smashing camera on my phone, which actually isn’t half bad, and I still haven’t managed to smash.